the biting truth


Tuesday, May 12, 2009

what does it take???

It amazes me to be so disgusted with my fat and yet to be so pathetic in my attempts to loose it. If I really and truly hated being fat as much as I say I do, wouldn't taking it off be my number one priority? [I mean after God, husband, and kids... so my number four priority??]

How can I hate something so deeply and yet not really be committed to doing anything about it?

But I am committed to doing something about it. Darn it. I am exercising dad-gum four to six times a week!! [you can see I have a real bad potty-mouth...] Doesn't that count for something?? Apparently not! Because, here I am, over six weeks into "the challenge" and only down 7 pounds! ARGH!! Darn it! Dad-gum! FIDDLESTICKS!!

Sigh. Yeah. Yeah. I know the drill. "Just keep it up." I know the positives... Here, let me recite them for you:
  • my body is healthier even if it's not much smaller
  • my body is re-shaping itself, although it's still very fat
  • I have built muscle
  • I have made a habit of exercising
  • yadda, yadda, yadda

I am tired of being fat! What does it take around here to motivate a fat girl to take drastic measures to achieve weight loss??

Last night, I actually discussed some sort of surgery to get me some help in this area. I have never seriously considered this option. I have heard the failure rate for weight loss surgery is quite high. But, then again, ya know, only about 98% people who loose weight following a diet gain it back. Talk about a high failure rate!!

Argh. That's my crap unload for ya. Hope it didn't bring you down.


SkinnieMinnie said...

Oh don't get too down but I know what its like and you will see some blue skies (and results soon). Keep on truckin babe xo

Lynne said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lynne said...

I totally get what you've written, but will say it sounds as if you have been trying to get this done. It is just not happening fast enough for you. It is a great thing you've lost 7lbs! I wish I could boast of the same loss, but lost .4lbs and am not exercising, barely journalling points at times, and just generally being lazy about my weight loss program. You inspire me to try harder, and if your success is not as tangible to the naked eye -- perhaps the intangible in helping those watching your progress will count for something. I think you're doing a wonderful thing, small steps but healthy ones. One day that ole scale will take off quicker in the right direction, if you keep at it. Just watch and see. As far as me...I am hoping with each encouragement I will get to where you are today. Blessings!

Aunt of 14 said...

The slower you lose weight AND KEEP AT IT... the more likely it will be long lasting. Thats what I heard. I have yet to practice that but it makes sense. If you lose weight fast, youre more likely to gain weight back and more... but if you go slowly... its more likely you'll stick to it in the long run because you've finally gotten USED to that routine.

I know instant gratification is a great bandaid, but it doesn't fix everything. I'm following you! :)

Beth said...

Surgery is such a personal choice, and nobody can tell you how to approach it or even to consider it, but I have the Lap-Band myself. I got it November 21 and as of today I am down 61.5 pounds, from a size 24 to a very loose 20 or slightly tight 18.

Some surgeries have bad results, but this one is the least invasive surgery there is, and you're not "rerouting your innards," so to speak. That was a huge no-no for me.

It's a bit slowe to lose than say gastric bypass, but slower is healthier and more realistic.

I started at 290 and am down this morning to 229.

I just wanted to put that out there for you to use as you see fit. I know your pain and struggles. :(