the fat girl decides thirty pounds ain't too shabby

I have lost thirty pounds so far. It's good. But, I'm still FAT.

Weightloss really is a moment by moment journey. I make atleast fifty decision a day that lead towards a weightloss at the end of the week. Or a weight gain. Pressure mounts when I stand in front of the fridge, making those decisions. Or at the fast food joint, staring at the menu options. Do I go healthy or unhealthy? Cheese or no cheese? Fries or skip 'em? Dessert or fruit?? Yadda yadda. Yidda yidda. And so it goes.

Loosing thirty pounds seems to validate that I might really succeed. This time. I definitely feel a weight loss momentum. There is a push of success behind me, barreling me ahead. Now, when I consider just giving up, the number thirty flashes in my brain like a night club's neon sign. I don't want to peddle backwards. Thirty pounds is nothing to sneeze at. Only sixty more pounds and I'll be out of the "morbidly obese" category. There's something to shoot for.

the fat girls' clothes grow

It's been awhile since I posted. Sorry about that.

I have good news. I have lost a total of 30 pounds since joining WW. I went from 273 down to 243. It feels awesome to be in the 240s. I know many people think weighing 240 is horrendous, but to me, it feels great!

Clothes that I hoarded away for years are fitting me again. I pulled out a green skort, slid it on and, gasp! it was even a little bit loose.

My underwear is looser. I got some adorable undies for Christmas [weird, I know, but it IS what I asked Santa for...] and they are too big now. I still wear them, though. And I enjoy how loose they are on my smaller, but still big, butt.

My bra needs re-forming. Rather, my boobs do. But that requires a new bra to reform the boobs. It's like they've been deflated. Hubby doesn't mind though, so why should I?

The shirts and blouses I wore at 276 now look pretty nice on this 243 frame. They must have been really tight back in November.

It just feels good.

Christmas with the Fat Girl

Wow. I really appreciated all of your comments, Ladies. [I assume you're all ladies, even the anonymous postings. I guess you could be men... but I doubt it.]

Here's what I think about WW. I think it is the most realistic weightloss approach out there. That said, I also believe that any diet will work if you follow the program. Ultimately it comes down to how many calories you consume verses how many calories you burn. Duh, right?

What I like about WW is that they don't teach a "diet" as much as they teach a lifestyle. The ugly truth is that we were not created to eat whatever the crap we want to eat and be skinny. Most skinny people watch what they eat. Many of those skinnies exercise religiously. Sad, but true, fellow fatties. We cannot sit around, eat chocolate and chips and cheese and expect our bodies to not get bigger and bigger.

Christmas came and went. I had planned to follow the healthy lifestyle plan all day. That lasted for about thirty minutes and two mini candy bars before I declared it a "free day". A day minus counting points and worrying about what was good for me and what wasn't good for me. I just wanted to enjoy Christmas. So, I did. But my stomach hurt all day long. Plus I had a raw ache of guilt in my gut all day. Really wonderful.

It comes down to this for me. I want to eat the crap. I want to eat chocolate. And, not just a little bit of it. Not just three points worth. No, no. I want to eat it ALL!! Give me a pound of chocolate covered peanuts and I'll down those suckers. That's my problem, Ladies. My Big, Fat Problem.

But now I've mumbled my way through another post. I promise some more fluent and understandable posts down the road. For now, my Internet is out and my thoughts are mushy.

Merry Christmas.

how about weight watchers

I'm watching The Biggest Looser. Final Four. I can only imagine how that show/program would change my life. There are some awesome things about that show, and some things I don't quite agree with. But, I'm not going to go there right now.

Body For Life is gone. Now, I am doing Weight Watchers. Again. Week Four this week. I've lost 8.2 pounds in three weeks. Tracking my points, etc. I am trying, once again to change my life. We are eating healthy and I am writing down everything.

I have not given up.