the biting truth


Friday, April 3, 2009

the @#$%^& morning work out!!!

Oh, I was such a bitch non-nice person this morning. Ack. Overly optimistic person that I am, I brightly suggested to the handsome hubby that we should just jog around the block instead of head off to the YMCA.

"Could we ride bikes?" he pleaded. There's a bit of history with the darn bikes. We invested about $300 into bikes and bike trailers last November. I have ridden my pretty bike about two times. The last time I road it some stranger made a rude comment while I drove by. That was fun.

But the husband is handsome. And I do want to be able to ride bikes with him. How romantic would that be? So, off we went.

It took all of one minute before I was huffing and puffing. Argh! Eight minutes later, my stupid weak wrists were burning in pain. Carpal Tunnel is a very non-fun condition.

See I have abdominal muscles that suck. They have carried four children and are loose and barely hold up my saggy belly fat. Requiring those wienie muscles to hold my body up so I don't have to support my weight on the handle bars just doesn't work. And then my wrists begin to hurt. And I get pretty bitchy cranky.

After the mile bike ride around the complex, we ditched the bikes and used our God-given ability to walk. Attempting to keep my heart rate at the "target heart rate" instructor Mike suggested, I actually broke into a jog. All two hundred and sixty-five pounds of me. Jogging. Wiggling. Jiggling. Such wondrous fun.

"Where did this come from?" not-out-of-breath-cute-husband asked me.

"Whatever." I replied curtly. He's lucky I didn't swear at him. I jogged until I couldn't stand it and then walked until I caught my breath. Jog. Walk. Jog. Walk.

Why am I such a bitch crank when I work out? Here's my evaluation: I am pissed off at myself for being so out of shape. Pissed. This is NOT who I want to be. I want to be able to jog a dad-gum-mile! I want to be able to ride the darn bike and not be winded two minutes into it. I am mad at my body.

Amazingly, the hubby thinks my bitchiness crankiness is sexy. Whatever.


Alicia said...

Too funny! Just keep doing it and it will get better. I admire you for getting up & doing it! I have been walking and every now I get the feeling to jog. I will jog, walk, jog, walk for a while. I love the feeling of jogging but I am so out of shape I think I am going to die. But I am trying to work myself up.

To answer your question I havent been sticking to WW like I should. I am definately watching what I eat and trying to exercise but no not doing to good on WW. Thanks for keeping up with me! Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

Serenity said...

LOL...Jellybean - You crack me the hell up...You sound like me when I am doing my excercise as well. I made the mess I am in and while trying to undo the damage, it just pisses me off even more!

Mighty M said...

Well, I am not in the best shape, but I am in pretty okay shape, and I get pretty cranky about exercise too. Before I start. By the time I am done I usually feel pretty glad that I "did it". Kudos for getting out there and doing it, and you don't have to be happy about it at all. Just keep pushing.

The Masked Mommy said...

Go you! You know what? Sometimes I feel like I want to jog, but I don't because I'm to embarrassed. So I just walk because I'm to "fat" to jog. I just feel like everyone is watching me and thinking "look at that fat girl trying to jog". So I just walk. Sigh.

Beth said...

Hey, at least he thinks it is sexy!

I did the very same thing today -- walk, run, walk, run. I have often said I couldn't run from here to my mailbox if Godzilla himself was after me. :)

However, today I did spurts of running that were definitely further than from here to my mailbox. :)

And I'm with you -- all 244 pounds of me. Ugh...

Serenity said...

Left you something on my blog :)

Alicia said...

Hey Girl! I have another award for you on my blog! Check it out!

I hope you are having a great week!

Serenity said...

Left you something again today :o) Hope all is well with you!

Tinika said...

I got something for you at my blog.

Lynne said...

At least you are out there doing it! When I read your comment about the person making fun of you, it reminded me of why I picked the name of one of my blogs...its called "I'm On A Mission". I had read an inspirational story of a woman that would visit the YMCA and swim. At first she did not want to go because of her size and the reality people would poke fun at her, but she finally got to the point of "Let them stare, I'm On A Mission". I know you will succeed and you are so blessed to have a husband that is actually willing to work out with you, if I could be so blessed! Blessings to you!