the biting truth


Friday, April 17, 2009

self sabotaging the fat girl

Why can't I end the day the way I begin it?

My resolutions run high and my will power is strong when the morning sun awakens me. [Or, when my children awaken me...] I feel like I can conquer the world. In the very least, conquer the darn stash of hidden chocolate.

The killer work outs remind me to not eat junk and the morning rushes about me, very much under control.

Lunch sneaks up on me, but I am still committed to good eating. As the evening approaches, my will power begins to dissolve. DISSOLVE. Like an alka seltzer dropped into a cup of water. The dinner plate grows into twice what I ate for breakfast. Then the kids go to bed and I start to snoop around the kitchen for anything and everything.

Since my will power has dissolved, nothing stops me from eating. In a matter of a few hours, I undo what I worked so hard to do all day. I nullify my own efforts. Is this called self-sabotage?


Alicia said...

I know...I have been on vacation and my main thought was "Im on vacation I should treat myself" and I did. I am so ashamed of what all I ate. Just the fact that I normally dont even eat that way but I did over the last 5 days. It's just so hard to follow through!

Aunt of 14 said...

Well, I'll have to be blunt and say yes. It is self-sabotage. But at the same time, I understand how that can happen. It happens to every single one of us. You might not be eating enough at lunch time to fulfill what your body is asking for so by the time dinner comes around... you're starving!

Tonight I had macaroni and cheese shells, thew some tuna in it and presto, tuna casserole. I ate one helping. I was STARVING after the last bite. I did not know what to do. So I drank some water. Did you know that if you drink warm water, it fills you up that you actually feel F U L L?

SkinnieMinnie said...

Oh I think willpower and determination are the biggest battle! But I am secretly glad to hear I am not the only one who struggles with starting the day great and determined only to end up.. well not so great! But you're trying and thats the main thing.

Lynne said...

I don't know if I would call it "self-sabotage" as much as perhaps you need to examine why your doing the night eating. Is it really hunger, boredom, emotional?? Then once you figure that out you can tackle the night eating problem. For myself, it usually falls into not eating the right foods throughout the day and then I'm starving or emotional eating because I've gotten upset over something.

Maybe you could prepare some "night foods" that are grab ready ... like at dinner time, cut up an apple and put it in a bowl in the fridge kind of thing.

Hang in there! I'm right there with you!